One last post before I start posting to my blog from here on out.
I decided to seek therapy. Lord I have had a time here on this earth and finally decided to give therapy a try. At first I was hesitant, I have a WHOLE lot of sense and I just couldn’t see anyone telling me something I didn’t already know.
But that’s the thing…my therapist helps me to remember who I am. She reminds me of who I am as a person. She is so very amazing and she’s been in my life this whole entire time, I would tag her but she’s not taking new clients however the Light this sister was able to shed on my existence is exactly what I needed. We’re not going to always get to the healing we need when people respond to us by saying “Im sending you Love and Light.” Love is more than words that sound good…its also action. And although it sounds beautiful, its not always helpful. Therapy serves to take a deeper look into the issues that replay themselves in our lives as lessons that we aren’t easily learning. Therapy is like a CliffNotes for your life. Some life lessons are a little bit more advanced and seeking help is ok.
People always say, we hear it all the time, you have to Love yourself. However its deeper than that because you actually have to be able to identify when you’re actually not being loving to yourself. She made me aware that I was using my capacity to Love against myself. Im so tolerant, understanding, loving and able to see the source of so much and in turn what do I do? Take a whole lot of abuse and BS because I understand why people are abusive so I am understanding to it and it works against me. I’d become so loving that I was actually starting to lose my natural mind because there was little room in my being to love myself. I just didn’t want to hurt anyone and didn’t realize to the degree I was hurting myself.
Things got so bad this time in my life I had to because I was going down a path I did not like so Im thankful I finally stopped and said…”You know what? I need help” and I sought it for myself. Im proud of me *big smile and self hug*