My Tantra Class: Chaos in Control
By definition, Tantra is the art of using energy for two purposes healing & manifestation. But how can we use this energy to do these things if we first seek to understand ourselves? So in the class, among other things, we were told to speak to our shadow self in attempt to get inner clarity. Now the shadow self is a part of our sub-conscious, the part of us that holds past traumas. These past traumas include all traumatic experiences such as the lost of a loved one, abuse, etc. When we do not properly address these issues we allow this part of us, the shadow self, to make a significant amount of our conscious decisions. Ever ask yourself why you keep doing what you’re doing and that action is completely detrimental to your well-being? Or can you never seem to enjoy yourself or be comfortable anywhere? Well most likely that’s your shadow self acting instead of you. It wants to be heard. You can either choose to let the shadow self run your life or you can address your issues and be at peace. Let me explain…
I know you all have heard of the “lil devil” and the “lil angel” on our shoulders telling us to do right or wrong? Well neither the “lil devil” or the “lil angel” is something that is outside of ourselves…we both contain both light and darkness. I hate to tell you but NO ONE outside of ourselves is telling us to do ANYTHING. So when you say “devil get behind me”…you are really speaking to your shadow self or pain body. Its sad to say, but there will be some of us that will do EVERYTHING this “devil” wants to do and not even look at the why? We just look at the end result, unhappiness, loneliness, etc. For example: The “lil devil” says, go ahead and curse that person out…they deserve it. And most will do just that…lol. But Tantra teaches us to look not at what it wants but why is it asking it of us. Why am I even being “told” to curse someone out? Instead of acting on every impulse immediately we stop and analyze the why and then we can heal that part of us and not be controlled by our shadow selves or our “lil devils”. To most, the “lil devil” holds more significance in our lives because most find it easier to do the “wrong” thing. So this leads to a lot of praying and asking for forgiveness when we don’t truly understand why we do what we do and therefore don’t even understand what we are asking forgiveness for. There must be a balance and its up to us to maintain the balance…between “good” and “evil”…light and darkness…conscious and subconscious. The yin and yang should be harmoniously linked. When we “hear” the voice of the dark side/shadow self don’t be afraid. Use it as an indicator to fix that dark part of yourself so that both sides can be at peace.
Once we achieve this balance then it will become abundantly clear how the energy contained in our vessels (our bodies) are linked to everything around us. Separation is only an illusion. And once we realize all is One…oh Wow! But I won’t get too deep into that here. lol
Now to my vision and why I took the class…
During meditation I was asked to bring forth my shadow self from my heart chakra and cup it in the palm of my hands. The teacher then asked “What does it look like? Is it ugly, deformed and/or hideous?” I said no, its just water dripping from my hands. I found this odd because everyone else saw these globs of deformed creatures and entities….mine was just water. I didn’t understand at first.
So the session continues and after we are done with the healing process the teacher then asks…”What does it look like now.” I then “see” in the palm of my hand that same water taking form as a liquid sphere reflecting everything around me in my hands. I swear before the teacher said move your hand back and let it float in the air I was already smiling and had done that before she said it. Then we were asked to take this new healed form into our heart chakras.
Now, I understand what the dripping water in my palms meant. My shadow self had no form it was water. But water unconstrained has no direction, it has no purpose. It will go wherever it wants to go and be whatever it wants to be. Now apply this to your own life…can you see how potentially dangerous that can be if we don’t seek to control such a powerful part of ourselves. We have the power to be both “good” and “bad”. If our shadow selves are just left to run rampant couldn’t that part of ourselves easily flow into the “bad” side just as well as the “good”? Imagine trying to enjoy anything with the shadow self just completely running rampant in our lives. How can we enjoy life, our families, SEX (yes its such a small part of Tantra but I threw it in because I know thats what you all wanted to hear me say lol), etc. So with Tantra we seek to be the high priest/priestess of the doorway between light and dark…good and evil. Tantra isn’t just a way of living…its the only way to live…in perfect balance.
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